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[15 May 2004|11:57am] |
new Lj
www.livejournal.com/users/gonewithcyanide
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[14 May 2004|11:37pm] |
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Have you ever felt so used that you swear that there are walls around you, the fucked up shit you see in the corner of your eye. When people swear that they know you, but they only know the show you put on for everyone. Have you ever been called a pussy, and suggested as someone that couldn't fight... but in your head you know you could take that person's life as the demoralize you. When your fist clenches, and you swear your going to hit it..... you never know who could be watching, and how it might scare them away...\
To the phantom lovers.
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[13 May 2004|10:15pm] |
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[11 May 2004|10:45pm] |
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i fucking hate how i try so dearly to help out all my friends with the girls they want, and i get nothing in fucking return. i supply them with info, supply with a place to hook up, i even introduce them. yet i get fucking nothing. Nothing, or no one can fucking ever change my goddamned opinion on how this shit works out. No one understands how it feels to see your friends bitch about how their relationships didnt work out. Well its fucking better to have loved and lost than to never loved at all... and they whine so fucking much about it. Well fucking fuck them. and you know goddamn who the fuck you are. fucking ungrateful little shits. This shit is fucking over. Im gonna stop being nice. i dont care if i lose everything. fuck everything that brings out the good in me, because it hurts me in the end.
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[11 May 2004|09:01pm] |
Today... is Tuesday. Dominoes 2X tuesday... Hmmmm?!
I just lifted some, I haven't in about a month... I started to feel bad to I'm back to hitting the weights every night... Ouch. But hey, i might start to look scary again. a week and 2 days till i go to N.C. till June 18th... its gonna suck. But i'll make money working, so it's all gravy.
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| w00t |
[08 May 2004|08:24am] |
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The show was last night. Everyone except a few playa hatas said we kicked ass. We got 33 fucking people! I was like... Whoa. Josh sounded amazing... but the sound guy was on crack so half the people in the crowd couldn't hear him, and the other half of the crowd couldn't hear the drums. So I was kinda pissed. Can't win them all though. This band Good Fortune was fucking awesome. They did a sublime song and a weezer song. It was awesome. They sounded really good. The Farewell News kicked ass. But they got screwed by the sound guy too. You couldn't hear brandon at all. But it's all gravy.
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[06 May 2004|05:03pm] |
It's my dad's B-DAY! Im gonna suprise him by telling a joke bout how old he is when he gets out of the car.
Tomorrow is the show. Everyone should go. except like, tico.
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[03 May 2004|09:38pm] |
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music |
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Ludacris - Roll Out. |
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xThroYoDubsUpx: this girl.
x12concealer03x: hot?
xThroYoDubsUpx: nah.
x12concealer03x: hah. If you said yes.
x12concealer03x: id say
x12concealer03x: what about on the the Braude scale.
xThroYoDubsUpx: hahahaha.
xThroYoDubsUpx: and shed be about a -3.
xThroYoDubsUpx: (thats being generous, mind you)
x12concealer03x: Will said paige wasn't hot.
x12concealer03x: and im like. dude, you watch to much porn
xThroYoDubsUpx: fuck that porn star shit...amateur sites is where its at!
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| wow... |
[01 May 2004|02:02am] |
It's late...
Today was, weird.
When I got off the bus, it was pooring down rain. On my way home I got drench. When I got home, I changed clothes and took a nap. I woke up and found out that my band will cover "roll out" by Ludacris. Fun! It's gonna kick so much ass. Which brings me to the show next Friday. I'm not THAT nervous, but this is my first show with the band at an actual venue. But. Im pretty sure we'll do fine.
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[28 Apr 2004|05:12pm] |
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...the house is being painted, and the smell is starting to get to me.
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[25 Apr 2004|09:32pm] |
david: like when the red is on the handle of the knife
x12concealer03x: thats why you scroll down jack ass.
x12concealer03x: haha
david: lol i did, its just inconvinient
x12concealer03x: cause it goes up.
x12concealer03x: lol
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[25 Apr 2004|09:11pm] |
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mood |
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Bleh |
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music |
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Atreyu - tullips are better |
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Man do I hate how shit comes back to bite you in the ass. I need some alone time.
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[25 Apr 2004|12:14am] |
I want to go home to a warm bed,
It's peacefullness, and the question if I'll ever wake up again.
I sometimes wonder if you do look at the stars,
Because we both live under the same sky.
I wonder if you think about me like you used to.
Sometimes it is like we never met
you talk to me like a stranger
Sometimes it is like we never shared mutual feelings
you touch me like i am a stranger
I want to go back to better days,
Their better memories, and the fear of saying goodbye
I sometimes wonder if i ever meant anything to you
because you never write me anymore letters
you need to get your thought together, face the noticable truth
I never knew what love is.
I only knew the way you made me feel.
I hope you're smart enough never to say it to me again.
Hopefully you have enough sense to never think of me again
I cant breathe when i see you
would you ever let me.
like a dagger through my neck
severing my spinal cord
trying to hard to breathe
In panic, i can't realize
that i won't take another breath of your air.
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[24 Apr 2004|09:54am] |
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mood |
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Im cool. |
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music |
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washer and dryer |
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Well, I figured that I'd update before I mowed the lawn. Last night I chilled with david. We walked over for a party that neither of us didn't really belong at, we were so out of place. There was like 100 kids there when we walked up, but whats funny, there was probably 150-200 kids there before we got there, because a convoy was leaving when we walked in. So we walked up, talked a bit... got a few of the, "scott, What the fuck are YOU doing here" then 50 kids went into the back yard... and it was pretty much the cool kids and preppy girls. Then the tokin black guy walks up, and david says "hes even more out of place then we are" and he like, "gets the fuck up out" so after we see nothing is happening, we go to KFC, then back to david's house. We worked out Devil in Jersy City by coheed, and it sounds so awesome with both guitar parts playing it together. Then i went home, and fell asleep...
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[22 Apr 2004|09:25pm] |
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point the target, we don't need no evidence.
Flood the market, we do it all in self defense.
your a smart kid, never work without your gloves.
If you're a smart kid, you'll stay the hell away from love.
and if it comes to murder, Don't tell and we won't ask you how
you sleep at night when the lights go out, and your all alone
with all the ghosts of lesser humans, whos lives you've split to suit your own.
your actions all are justified
But don't we all bleed red blood
don't we all need red blood.
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[21 Apr 2004|06:45pm] |
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mood |
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blank |
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music |
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King of the hill |
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Man. I have no inspiration for this next entry. Tell me what YOU do to find inspiration.
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[19 Apr 2004|05:18pm] |
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mood |
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i feel like a goddamned rock journalist |
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music |
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Thursday - Autobiography of a nation |
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From 3 to 5, I things that id usually never do... I played Mario for 45 minutes. Then started to read. In the book im reading "Nothing Feels Good" a chapter explained that no one is aloud to make eye contact with Rivers Cuomo(singer/guitarist of weezer) Which meant a dressing room lockdown while he makes it to the stage... So weird... but typical. You just have to listen to the nerd rock self titled weezer album (aka The Blue Album) and the slightly more sex crazed, japanese fetish Pinkerton.... "Goddamn you half japanese girls, you do it to me everytime, Yeah the red head says she shreds the cello, but im jello baby" Yeah... Good stuff. I also read about how Chris Carabba (Cmon, everyone reading my journal should know him) actually played a huge part in the discovery of thursday. While being payed for an interview, he said 'Yeah, theres this band from new jersy called thursday. Watch out for them, they are going to be huge'
I imagine thursday to take a somewhat of path like blink 182 did... There first album, Barely recognized despite good cuts, Their second album, full collapse, Now frequently bought due to the sucess of their latest 'War all the time' which has inspired a somewhat played music video..."Signals over the air" if you know anything about blink before 1999's release enema of the state, you could definatly see how their paths resemble... Im just glad i hopped on the band wagon early.
Scott.
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[18 Apr 2004|11:03am] |
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You know how in late september, how the leaves they fall in wer cement, then they are scraped away leaving their mark in the sidewalk, so suddenly i can remember, what ive said to you and how you felt, Countless days of loving my rope woven net. Id could fall for a countless number of days,, suddenly be swept up and saved forever, but sometimes i get caught, get smuthered. i wish i could be the warm blanket to cover you while your sad fetal position on your floor, kicking and screaming for better moments, i wish i could take your world, change it make as you want before your eyes, i wish i could love only as a brother could, Like your spinal severed, trying so hard to breathe, my dearest friend, daddy's little angel lost her wings today
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[17 Apr 2004|10:41am] |
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mood |
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Meh |
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music |
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Thursday - Standing On the edge of summer. |
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Saturday! YES! Last night I did absolutly nothing. I stayed up till 1 playing a 3 hour game of StarCraft...Today i have band practice. My cousin and a few of her friends might come watch us today... but i highly doubt they will like our music. I think shes into the whole pop punk avril phase right now. But yeah. Thats still probably better than what i listen to.
Scott.
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